Let go
by GloryDinosaur
Summary: She is damaged. He is a ghost. He needs her. He won't tell her why though... She has to leave everything to help him. Rated M for mature themes and possible swearing etc. Crappy summary...
1. Chapter 1

Let go.

_**-Hey, Enjoy. Review for me. Title is pants, I know but I couldn't think of anything else D:**_

_**I don't own the Infernal Devices it belongs to Cassandra Clare.- **_

_**"We never made it to the start of the race, I guess I thought we would be saved..."Charlie Simpson Cemetary.**_

The wind howled though the small town. The thunder whipped the grey horizon. The water was twirling violently under the tall red stone cliffs. This was it. This was the end. Nobody had seen a storm this bad for decades. The scientists blamed it on global warming and the religious people blamed it on god's wrath at the modern ways of life. Tessa knew though. Tessa knew it was _him_. He was so impatient. She took a long gulp of the burning whiskey in her hand. She laughed once. It wasn't a pleasant sound. It hadn't been pleasant for a long, long time.

She looked at the 56 year old whiskey in her hand. Her Father would be more upset at her taking his prised whiskey opposed to her jumping into the stormy water below. She had always struggled with trying to be normal. She had never been comfortable being herself. She would always reinvent herself to be something she wasn't. Tessa didn't know who the real Tessa was. She knew she was a quiet girl that lived for her books. But other than that she didn't know. She had never been comfortable to be quiet around people; she had always been brash and loud around them. If she had them laughing with her, they weren't laughing at her. She had always been different.

Lightening cracked through the grey haze of the clouds and Tessa couldn't help but notice just how beautiful it was. She had always thought storms were beautiful. She thought about trying to conform for her family. Maybe her Mother would put of more time with her; her dad would treat her like Jessie's Dad treated her- a princess. She had been always been a disappointment to her parents. She could never conform, she was never the girl with a face of make-up and beautifully curled hair, and she was just there really. Trying to be someone she wasn't.

She knew _he_ would be growing impatient. She had promised she would do it as soon as she saw the water. She would plunge in to the freezing North Sea. Let the freezing salty water fill her lungs and take her to _him_. The grumpy Victorian adolescence stuck. The same grumpy adolescence who loved her. With _his_ piercing blue eyes and black thick curls that framed possibly the most beautiful face she had ever seen. Why _he_ picked her of all the girls in the world to come and stay with him, she didn't know. She was just boring and a total plain Jane. She was only really good at reading books, you didn't get medals and parents love by just reading books. You had to be great like Nate. He was everything. The golden child. The perfect child. Blonde hair, blue eyes, sporty, musical, smart… yeah everything. Whereas Tessa was uncoordinated, brown hair, grey eyes, sounded like a cat was dying if she belted out a note, and an average grade puller. So it was easy to see why her parents adored Nate and sort of just tolerated her.

She pulled at her copper bangle; she held it in her trembling hand. The bangle Jem had bought her last Christmas. It was simple. It had been silver when he gave her it. Silver like his eyes he said. Silver so she would always have a bit of him once he died. She traced her fingers over the words inscribed. '_Live the life you have imagined. Dream' _what was the life she had imagined? She supposed a little house, with an office with a typewriter full of her stories. Jem making pancakes in the morning and their child running about. She promised she would only ever have one child. That way there would never be a tag-along. That life would never happen now though. Jem was gone. She felt a sharp wind tug the bracelet away from her and throw it in the choppy, ominous sea. _He _really was a jealous fucker.

She cried out at the loss of her beloved bracelet. Her last physical reminder. She leaned her head back and screamed at _him. _Why was she doing this again? Because if Tessa killed herself, she could be with Jem maybe. She would at least see his short silver hair and matching eyes. Jem had left her though; he promised he would always be with her. Jem wasn't though was he? But she had _him_ now. _He _promised her _he _wouldn't leave her like Jem had. _He_ would keep her safe forever she just had to come to him.

_He _told her not to think of his appearance or name. Then they might find _him._ Then they would separate them. Forbid them from loving each other. She wondered who they were.

It was now. The rain battered at her small frame. She shivered against the cold wind surrounding her. She took the last gulp of whiskey. The liquid confidence coursed through her body. She rose up on the tips of her toes and smiled. She bounced on the balls of her feet throwing her arms back towards the sky and she pushed herself up off of the ground. For a second she was flying. Towards the open skies. But that wasn't the case. She started to plummet and of course gravity was pulling her down towards the cold salty water.

Tessa wouldn't see the flock of people rushing towards her. They had been there all along watching her slowly work up her courage to jump. She wouldn't hear her Mother scream as she fell. She wouldn't see her brother break through to try save her. All she would see is darkness, as she fell into the next realm. Life was just beginning for Miss Gray.

**-A/N, Hey so that's it, I've left it so it would work as a one shot or I could easily continue. I have soo many plans I just want response to this. So Tessa is very fickle but don't hate her. Everyone changes.- **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two **

**-Hey, if you actually read this and don't review thanks but please review and make my heart happy, anyway aside from being a review whore. Thank you so much to my reviewers, you all made my heart happy :D. Sorry to keep you waiting for this next chapter. I haven't updated because I have been working on my own story :D. Which I may post as a fanfic and just change the names but that might not happen. Sorry for any grammar mistakes, no beta. I also discovered tumblr properly; safe to say I'll be failing my exams. So where did I leave you? Ah yes. Recap time - **

**_Recap-_**

**_It was now. The rain battered at her small frame. She shivered against the cold wind surrounding her. She took the last gulp of whiskey. The liquid confidence coursed through her body. She rose up on the tips of her toes and smiled. She bounced on the balls of her feet throwing her arms back towards the sky and she pushed herself up off of the ground. For a second she was flying. Towards the open skies. But that wasn't the case. She started to plummet and of course gravity was pulling her down towards the cold salty water. _**

**_ Tessa wouldn't see the flock of people rushing towards her. They had been there all along watching her slowly work up her courage to jump. She wouldn't hear her Mother scream as she fell. She wouldn't see her brother break through to try save her. All she would see is darkness, as she fell into the next realm. Life was just beginning for Miss Gray.-_**

He panted, he didn't need to but he did. His body didn't function like the breathers did, he was just a ghost but in a solid body; the afterlife really puzzled him. They were all wary of him down here. He was a good guy in a sea of evil, so they just generally left him to float 'around' waiting for his destiny. He had no idea why he was down here amongst all the old haggled, evil souls but there had to be a reason. He could barely remember his mortal life apart from his appearance, which stayed had stayed with him. There was something well more like someone else he remembered a girl. A girl with brown hair and gray eyes. And all he was sure of was; he had to save this girl. He had to find her first in the labyrinth of the afterlife.

She arrived in his realm. It was dark and kind of cold. She lay on the cold ground; it was like a rough forest floor. The mud was pretty much frozen though, her long frizzy brown hair was soaking and it clung to the cold ground. She didn't understand where she was… she didn't get where Will was. He had promised as soon as she woke, he'd be there. Lying jackass. She started to stand up, trying not to hit her head on the branches of the skeleton trees above her. She looked around the area she was stood in; she could see no sign of life. The trees were barren of leaves, just like bones without flesh that hung in the black air. There was no stars, no moon. Just nothingness. She took in a deep breath of the night air and she tasted it. The taste of stale, old and death. She tried to spit it out. But it lingered in her lungs. She could see a figure ahead. Much smaller than her, covered in old rags. She ran towards it, her limbs fluid as she ran.

"Excuse me! Can you help me?!" She shouted after the small figure as she ran, trying to catch her breath which was odd. Wasn't she meant to be dead? The figure looked behind to see who was chasing it; they didn't wait though it started to run. Far away from Tessa, like she was trouble.

The thing about the figure was he knew who the girl was. He knew she had departed before she was meant to depart. He knew the secrets of the afterlife. He needed to get away from her. They'd punish him for this. Talking to a breather, just like they had taken Will away. The most arrogant, idiotic thing he had met aside from this girl. Why would she kill herself for one of them, it didn't make sense to this warlock, he had been trapped here for more years than he could be bothered to remember and he would take any opportunity to leave.

"Would you please help me?! I'm so lost and confused?!" She shouted after him her heart hammering against her chest as she run. "Please! I'm desperate!" He turned to look at the tall brunette. Her pale, thin face contorted almost to the point of tears as she lowered her head. He was a sucker for a pretty woman with a problem, could he still speak English properly. Time to see, when he had grazed earth, English was sneered upon viewed to only be spoken by the poor. Latin the superior language.

He shook his head and grew to his full height; he liked to remain small when travelling. It was faster. He slowly walked towards the young breather, breathing in the fresh smell of life. How long had it been since he smelled that delectable smell. He sniffed hard and grinned. His eyes shifting like a cat. As he stepped towards her. He knew they'd punish him for this. They frowned upon this, well frown would be putting it lightly he assumed. So if he was going to help her, she was going to help him escape this permanent night. Help him see the sun again.

"I will help you Miss but in this world we pay with favours." He spoke, surprised by his English. Maybe that bar he spent time in actually helped a little.

"Please help me." She begged him, not caring of the freakish magic she had just saw "Where am I?"

"Child, you are in the realm of the dead." He said rolling up a sleeve for the fine coat he had manifested. "I want your blood though" He said as he pulled out the pocket watch. If she didn't help, he'd simply end her with a charm and trap her with him. It was fair and besides he'd take care of her. He was possibly setting her up for failure, he didn't care. He had always put humans before him and look where it got him.

She held out her arm and he didn't waste time extracting the pure life blood, he wondered to tell her what he planned to do with her not. No. Not for now. He liked to keep folks on tenterhooks. He nicked her pale skin, the fresh scent of life breathing in the dead woodland. Shit. He didn't think this one through; it was already starting to bloom with her presence never mind her blood dripping down her arm. He sped up the healing as he placed the blood close to his heart in a pocket as he started to walk away from her as she followed. There was something strange of this human though. He didn't have time to decode the situation.

"What is your name?" She asked her voice slightly more relaxed than before. She shouldn't get to comfortable, he scolded in her head. Humans! God they annoyed him.

"Magnus Bane. I know yours breather Theresa Gray. Prefers to be called Tessa. No I can't read minds before you ask, you've just caused havoc." He sighed to himself, hoping her curiosity would be put aside for now. "Come along, we need to leave here now. Everything is a spy. Helpful guide to this realm number one. Nobody is really an ally to you ."

They walked for what seemed hours upon hours. Till they hit where the real hustle and bustle was. He could feel her curiosity almost bursting at the seams as he pulled her in the small apartment he abided in.

**-Sorry for leaving it like that guys, more reviews please. I feel like this chapter isn't very good so I'm sorry. L I'll try to update by next week, just to clarify there will be absolutely no romance between Magnus and Tessa.-**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three

**-Disclaimer- I do not own the infernal devices or any characters that may be associated with it, the infernal devices all belong to Cassandra Clare. **

** I hope you like it, thank you to my reviewers! Must admit I will chop and change viewpoints as the characters speak to me. Will speaks in first person. Leave me reviews!-**

I sat in the small room, how long had I sat here? An hour? A week? A month even? I doubted it was much more than that. I looked over the flat, sickly black walls, the rough concrete floor. After all my attempts, I finally got one who was _her_. To join me. To save me. Prove my innocence to them but of course they found me before I could consummate our love. It wasn't ethical my means of getting her here. I still had her bangle. How could she think of the pathetic breather more than me?! We could be everything together. We could have it the way it was before I turned into a cock. She was my soul mate, not that bampot. If only they'd allowed me to reincarnate. I could have won her back, they let the other two reincarnate.

**A Victorian Tragedy. **

It was a beautiful night, the sun shone down on the small cottage that was crammed in a clearing in between the mountains, it had belonged to a Sheppard once but he had long died and the new family moved in. The girl who was covered in bruises and her husband who was the _Herondale_ boy. The name was covered in scandal. A sister that committed _suicide. _A Father that _cheated_ on his wife and _gambled_ away the family fortune. A mother _left_ the father with the remaining children. The other sister was a _lesbian. _And the biggest scandal of them all the son. He married Tatiana Lightwood, the heiress to her Father's immense fortune. He _impregnated_ her. Their child was christened Reuben, a fine young boy he was. At three he had his father's thick black glossy curls and mother's bright green eyes. He was already becoming haughty; he had a keen interest in hunting and fishing. He even pretend played with the cigars. They were the perfect family; the son was a good seed from a rotten bunch.

Till the yank maid seduced him with her devil like qualities. They ran off, _together_. He was a _deserter_ just like his mother. Just another bad seed. They ran to the hills, they set up a life but our tragic desperate son trying so hard to forget the sister that had _killed herself_, the sister that c_hased after girls_, the _gambling and cheating_ Father and of course the mother that had _left him_ to try fix a _broken family_; turned to the whiskey and tobacco. His poor little yank suffered every night he would hit her. Make her feel worthless. Tell her his demise was her fault, she was the devil. She believed him. Something happened.

They hung him. They hung him over the hills. The people were led by the town Pastor. The perfect one. The one that begged the little yank to pick him. The son couldn't have anyone take his little one away; the son couldn't have anyone's hands on his little one. She was his. She would always be his. This battle would wage on. The son won for now.

**Present down world. **

I shook my head, trying to forget finding her dead. The people blaming me. I was innocent. I had to prove it, I could get her to remember her past life, and I could prove to them I was innocent. They'd let us go to Idris. Our bliss. _Together_. Happy.

I swung back on my legs, trying to feel the back wall for loose bricks and loose spaces; I wondered… hm. Wait a minute the dagger. I yanked my dagger out my coat pocket, quickly working the bricks trying to see if any were loose. The bricks were large I could with a little difficulty slide out. I found one in the bottom corner, extremely loose. This wouldn't take a lot of work; I quickly pushed it out. I placed the dagger back in my pocket as I pushed my hands against it and shoved gently. A similar feeling to adrenaline pumping through me as I watched it fall down the long hill. I pushed my callused hands out towards a large and crooked but very dead and bare white oak tree, my anchor to freedom. I could taste freedom and death. Shit, they'd put me in death worlds prison. That was the furthest away from everywhere. I quickly stood up dusting myself off as I walked towards the path that would lead me home.

A few hours later as I walked through the dead forest. I could see something strange, life. It lingered like a bad smell at a party as the path started to sprout small flowers and grass. The bird's skeletons tweeting a tune. The smell of life floating through the air. Her scent. The scent of life. I took a long deep sniff, it still smelled the same. It had never changed. The light almost like chalk smell with a slight of hint violets. It smelled like home. He smiled, and sprinted forwards. His ears picked up on the faint trickling noise of water, shit she really had landed with a bang. I could see the opening of the woods as I escaped into the hustle and bustle of the city. The automobiles and horse and carriages whizzing around, nobody bothering about speed really. We were already dead; all we could do is drink. I walked towards my old haunt. Smith's it was a bar/opium den (opium had an effect on the dead oddly enough as did alcohol) it even served up all the warlocks, demons and other horrible supernatural's needs for curses etc. I slid in the front door; I could already hear the loud angry voices, the smell of cheap and nasty alcohol and not to forget the sweet and succulent smell of opium. Although nothing would ever smell as good after smelling my Tessa again. I was going to have to find her in this shithole of a town but patience. All good things come to those who wait. I walked up to the bar; digging in my pocket for a few coins and I threw them at the bar tender. I just wanted to forget the past for a while. Convince myself I was worthy of her again.

I never would be. She would always deserve the pastor. But I just couldn't allow that, she was **mine**. **All mine**.

**- Thank you for reading, I actually have a pretty good idea where I'm going with it now. The yank is a past Tessa just to confirm and Will was the son. I may do a sort of story of little chapters of flashbacks like that about Magnus', Will's, Tessa's and Jem's previous lives. Please leave me reviews, so I know it's good and whether to continue. ****Not Beta'd all my own mistakes.- ****  
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